Today I made the sad realization that I only have three weeks left in this country, three weeks left in this strange, undefinable, marvelous, interesting country. I always knew that it would go by fast, but I still cannot help but feel shocked at just how fast it is going. Three weeks and I will be home in America, which is definitely not a bad thing, there are things to which I am looking forward, but I am just not ready yet to go back. Right now, I am in a period of self-discovery. I am finding both comfort and confidence in the Russian language in terms of reading, writing, listening, and especially speaking. Speaking is one of the hardest aspects to grasp when learning a new language because so often you do not have access to the environment in which it is spoken. It has taken me awhile to come to terms with my relationship with the Russian language. In the past year, I began to worry that I had reached a plateau, that maybe my skills could not take me much further, and that scared me. It took the kinds words of one of my cousins, conversations with friends and family, and self-reflection to realize just how wrong I was. I am still learning and I am still growing and as long as I have the passion and the fervor, I will continue to do both. Coming to Russia has certainly made me realize that I made the right choice when I entered college, and that is important; in fact, it is energizing.
Since arriving back from travel week, much has happened, and it is somewhat difficult to know where to begin. Classes resumed: early mornings, schedules, homework, tests. I felt pretty good, energized from the break, ready to tackle hour and a half long classes. But after a week, I again began to look forward to another break despite the fact that I am not ready nor do I want to leave Russia just yet and the end of classes means doing just that. Hm. The first weekend back in Piter, I spent not doing a whole lot that was exciting - I ended up trying on half a dozen dresses for an 18th Century Ball, souvenir shopping, and doing homework in a cafe along Nevsky Prospect.
Spring is finally arriving! Yesterday I discovered buds on trees, and greener grass. There are other signs, as well, like the multitude of street musicians, bikers, and people rollerblading. Rollerblading stills seems to be quite popular here. The days are getting longer and longer, it is staying light past 10 pm now! It is strange because it never quite feels late - it creeps up fast on you. And there is no longer ice on the Neva or in the canals (well, almost, we are in a freeze/thaw cycle)!
Here is a short story: One morning, as I was riding the Marshrutka to school, a thick layer of fog descended over the Neva. It was so dense, you could not even see the opposite it bank. As I crossed it, it felt like I was floating through space or going into some mysterious world that is removed from our own. It was a wonderfully strange experience and sensation. I could feel my emotions swell and I am recording this now - in haste, unfortunately - so I can perhaps return to it and flush out the details, make a real story out of it.
These past couple of weeks I have spent getting cultured. Last Wednesday, I took a walking tour of Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment. It was really cool to be able to walk the streets, see the buildings, and see the bridges and canals that were in the novel itself. Friday, I saw Tchaikovsky's opera "The Queen of Spades" at Mikhailovsky Theater (Пиковая Дама Pikovaya Dama) which is an adaption of Aleksandr Pushkin's short story of the same title. It just so happens that Queen of Spades is my favorite Pushkin work, so it was a real treat to go and see it despite the fact that Tchaikovsky changed it up quite a bit. The one unfortunate part of that evening was that my friend's wallet was pick pocketed as we were about to go to dinner! However, she was still able to get into see the show with me. The weekend was spent learning to do the polka in preparation for the 18th Century Ball (more on this in a bit) and having the opportunity to visit a memorial that I have wanted to see since the day I arrived: the Siege of Leningrad Memorial. It was both somber and beautiful.
Something else happened on Saturday that made the weekend really great: I met several Russian students while exploring a rooftop with Ely. Of course I have met other Russian students, but this was different, it was by chance and it was natural. We ended up talking and laughing for the next several hours in a mixture of Russian and English. They were just as excited to practice their English as we were to practice our Russian! Hopefully, we will get together again before I leave Russia.
Tuesday, following classes, I went to see Stravinsky's ballet the Fire Bird at Mariinsky Theater. No wonder the Mariinsky Ballet is considered one of the best in the world - I have not been to many ballets, but this one was absolutely fantastic! We had great seats with a great view at a great price (that is, Maya and I). It was special for me in another, more personal way. For a long time, even though I do not know much about ballet, I always had imagined that one day one of the characters in the book I have been writing would be a principle ballerina in the Mariinsky Ballet. While there, watching the performance, I imagined that one of the dancers on stage was, in fact, a character from my book.
On the way home from the ballet, upon entering the metro, my backpack somehow got caught on the escalator, which was awkward for a couple of reasons. The main one being that as I tried to step backwards to untangle myself, but since it was an escalator, I moved in one place. Not to mention, a whole crowd of Russians were waiting to get on the escalator behind me...finally one of them came to help and unhooked me. Then, something humorous happened on the train itself. An old man stepped on, and so a woman stood up to give him her seat. He flat out refused, saying he would not take a woman's seat. She insisted, but he held fast, and they argued for a minute or two about who should be sitting in that seat. Finally, another man, younger, stood up, thus resolving the issue and both the old man and woman were able to sit.
Wednesday, I had every intention to study for two tests that I would be taking on Friday, but instead joined some friends after class and went to the Museum of Russian Political History. We spent all of our time moving through the Soviet exhibits, listening to our very knowledgeable guide. This is a topic on which I could go off, especially about the years Stalin was in power. It was scary. There is a certain discomfort that builds at the base of your stomach and it is hard to wrap your head around it. I am so fascinated by Stalin, and hopefully I can spend the summer learning more about him and what he did. Just to give you an idea, he went through every province and republic of the Soviet Union and listed how many people should be killed in each one - no names (although in other instances he personally chose whom should disappear, be killed, or sent to gulags) - just numbers. Two thousand people should be killed here, one thousand in this province, and so on - it was a quota that needed to be filled. It was class warfare and the numbers represented wealthy peasants or just about anyone else who was opposed to the regime and Soviet ideology. I will leave it at that for now.
On a brighter note, Thursday was the 18th Century Ball at Smolny Convent, where I study. It was so much fun to dress up in period attire, dance the polka, witness a duel, and spend time with friends. The light was so nice by that time of the evening that it made for great photos. At the end, we all danced to modern music - which was really hilarious due to the fact that we were all dressed up in 18th Century attire. I am so glad I decided to participate, I have not danced like that in such a long time, and it was refreshing.
Now, Friday has come and gone, and Saturday morning I leave for Pskov. This fact means I should head to bed now, so good night!
Since arriving back from travel week, much has happened, and it is somewhat difficult to know where to begin. Classes resumed: early mornings, schedules, homework, tests. I felt pretty good, energized from the break, ready to tackle hour and a half long classes. But after a week, I again began to look forward to another break despite the fact that I am not ready nor do I want to leave Russia just yet and the end of classes means doing just that. Hm. The first weekend back in Piter, I spent not doing a whole lot that was exciting - I ended up trying on half a dozen dresses for an 18th Century Ball, souvenir shopping, and doing homework in a cafe along Nevsky Prospect.
Spring is finally arriving! Yesterday I discovered buds on trees, and greener grass. There are other signs, as well, like the multitude of street musicians, bikers, and people rollerblading. Rollerblading stills seems to be quite popular here. The days are getting longer and longer, it is staying light past 10 pm now! It is strange because it never quite feels late - it creeps up fast on you. And there is no longer ice on the Neva or in the canals (well, almost, we are in a freeze/thaw cycle)!
Peter and Paul Fortress |
The Neva River |
Here is a short story: One morning, as I was riding the Marshrutka to school, a thick layer of fog descended over the Neva. It was so dense, you could not even see the opposite it bank. As I crossed it, it felt like I was floating through space or going into some mysterious world that is removed from our own. It was a wonderfully strange experience and sensation. I could feel my emotions swell and I am recording this now - in haste, unfortunately - so I can perhaps return to it and flush out the details, make a real story out of it.
These past couple of weeks I have spent getting cultured. Last Wednesday, I took a walking tour of Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment. It was really cool to be able to walk the streets, see the buildings, and see the bridges and canals that were in the novel itself. Friday, I saw Tchaikovsky's opera "The Queen of Spades" at Mikhailovsky Theater (Пиковая Дама Pikovaya Dama) which is an adaption of Aleksandr Pushkin's short story of the same title. It just so happens that Queen of Spades is my favorite Pushkin work, so it was a real treat to go and see it despite the fact that Tchaikovsky changed it up quite a bit. The one unfortunate part of that evening was that my friend's wallet was pick pocketed as we were about to go to dinner! However, she was still able to get into see the show with me. The weekend was spent learning to do the polka in preparation for the 18th Century Ball (more on this in a bit) and having the opportunity to visit a memorial that I have wanted to see since the day I arrived: the Siege of Leningrad Memorial. It was both somber and beautiful.
"Home of Raskolnikov" Raskolnikov is the principle character in Dostoevsky's Crime and Punishment. The man on the plaque is Fyodor Dostoevsky. |
Something else happened on Saturday that made the weekend really great: I met several Russian students while exploring a rooftop with Ely. Of course I have met other Russian students, but this was different, it was by chance and it was natural. We ended up talking and laughing for the next several hours in a mixture of Russian and English. They were just as excited to practice their English as we were to practice our Russian! Hopefully, we will get together again before I leave Russia.
Tuesday, following classes, I went to see Stravinsky's ballet the Fire Bird at Mariinsky Theater. No wonder the Mariinsky Ballet is considered one of the best in the world - I have not been to many ballets, but this one was absolutely fantastic! We had great seats with a great view at a great price (that is, Maya and I). It was special for me in another, more personal way. For a long time, even though I do not know much about ballet, I always had imagined that one day one of the characters in the book I have been writing would be a principle ballerina in the Mariinsky Ballet. While there, watching the performance, I imagined that one of the dancers on stage was, in fact, a character from my book.
On the way home from the ballet, upon entering the metro, my backpack somehow got caught on the escalator, which was awkward for a couple of reasons. The main one being that as I tried to step backwards to untangle myself, but since it was an escalator, I moved in one place. Not to mention, a whole crowd of Russians were waiting to get on the escalator behind me...finally one of them came to help and unhooked me. Then, something humorous happened on the train itself. An old man stepped on, and so a woman stood up to give him her seat. He flat out refused, saying he would not take a woman's seat. She insisted, but he held fast, and they argued for a minute or two about who should be sitting in that seat. Finally, another man, younger, stood up, thus resolving the issue and both the old man and woman were able to sit.
Wednesday, I had every intention to study for two tests that I would be taking on Friday, but instead joined some friends after class and went to the Museum of Russian Political History. We spent all of our time moving through the Soviet exhibits, listening to our very knowledgeable guide. This is a topic on which I could go off, especially about the years Stalin was in power. It was scary. There is a certain discomfort that builds at the base of your stomach and it is hard to wrap your head around it. I am so fascinated by Stalin, and hopefully I can spend the summer learning more about him and what he did. Just to give you an idea, he went through every province and republic of the Soviet Union and listed how many people should be killed in each one - no names (although in other instances he personally chose whom should disappear, be killed, or sent to gulags) - just numbers. Two thousand people should be killed here, one thousand in this province, and so on - it was a quota that needed to be filled. It was class warfare and the numbers represented wealthy peasants or just about anyone else who was opposed to the regime and Soviet ideology. I will leave it at that for now.
On a brighter note, Thursday was the 18th Century Ball at Smolny Convent, where I study. It was so much fun to dress up in period attire, dance the polka, witness a duel, and spend time with friends. The light was so nice by that time of the evening that it made for great photos. At the end, we all danced to modern music - which was really hilarious due to the fact that we were all dressed up in 18th Century attire. I am so glad I decided to participate, I have not danced like that in such a long time, and it was refreshing.
Now, Friday has come and gone, and Saturday morning I leave for Pskov. This fact means I should head to bed now, so good night!